Hallo mein scheissehunden! (that's German folks, I think) Welcome back to your usual sports banter here at the old Hangar. I took a little bit of a break yesterday but after putting up 10 posts in 2 days, I figured it was time for one. But we're back with the nonsense that the few of you that come here have come to know and love. We'll start the day off with some Good Guys Links- Caps Edition. Later today I'll catch us up on some Orioles stuff and then have a metal album retrospective and hopefully another episode of "Bad Movies I Love," time permitting. Hopefully I can come at you with a mix of sports and non-sports stuff to help bring balance to the Force. So, without any further rambling introductions, here's some Caps stuff.
- Then there is this dandy quote (per Puck Daddy & Tank) from Bruce Boudreau that will surely cost him some cash... "I've looked at them five times in there and I can't see where these calls are," Boudreau said. "It's my humble opinion, but holy frig. Those are some, in my estimation, some really iffy calls." "There's no chance [Fleischmann's penalty] was a dive," he added. "His leg got corkscrewed. Then on Green's, when they went to the double minor, they cross-checked him in the head and then Pitkanen went at [Green]. Pitkanen goes at him and Mike retaliates and there still was only two [minutes] given each."
I've been involved with the sport of hockey now for 23 years as both a player and a fan. My dad took me to my first game in 1986 - the Caps vs. the old Winnipeg Jets at the Capitol Centre. I've played against and with players of all sizes and skill levels from New Brunswick to Los Angeles. I've seen, in person, just about every great hockey player to come down the pike in that time - from Gretzky, Mario Lemieux and Mark Messier to Alex Ovechkin, Sidney Crosby and Jaromir Jagr. And in that time, I cannot remember a player I have hated more than Ulf Samuelsson. Hate is a very strong word. Often its thrown around in a cavalier way. We don't really hate, we just don't like some people. Hate is not just a really crappy song by the Plain White T's. Hate is the foundation for wars, holocausts and terrorism. Hate can be a scary thing, especially hating someone we've never met.
That being said, as a youngster I HATED Ulf Samuelsson. Hated him. Hated the guy so much, I practically hated the entire population of Sweden just on principle because Samuelsson was Swedish. To me, Samuelsson was the antichrist with a hockey stick. Just an incredibly loathsome player. You see, Samuelsson wasn't just some pest. Guys like Claude Lemieux, Esa Tikkanen, Scottie Upshall, Steve Ott and Sean Avery were/are pests. Annoying yes but never anything more than nuisances. Samuelsson on the other hand, was a menace. He was dirty. He tried to end careers. And then when he would have to answer the bell, he'd turtle. What is turtling? It's hockey parlance for a guy that ducks his head and won't fight. Looks something like this... That wasn't all. He'd take dives. He'd feign getting hurt and lay there on the ice like someone just stabbed him. Then he'd be miraculously healed, get up and start the power play.
You will notice in the above photo the guy wanting to pummel Samuelsson. That would be Cam Neely, who was and is my favorite non-Caps player ever. By the 1991 playoffs, Neely was the premier power winger in the game. He was coming off back-to-back 50 goal seasons and was one of the game's good guys to boot. And yet his career was never the same after this run-in with Samuelsson in the '91 Wales Conference Finals.
But Neely wasn't the only player Samuelsson put out of hockey. There was Montreal's Pierre Mondou, a talented forward who scored 30 goals 3 times in 8 seasons. Mondou's career was ended by a Samuelsson high-stick to the eye. All you really needed to know about Samuelsson was the title of a Sports Illustrated piece on him entitled "Mr. Dirty." That's exactly what he was. The worst part of all this is that the Pittsburgh fans loved the guy. Oh did this infuriate me as a youngster. How could they cheer for this guy? Here was the biggest chickenshit cheapshot artist of all time and these people cheer him? I would have been embarrassed to have a guy like Samuelsson on my team. A guy who recklessly put people's careers in jeopardy, all the while wearing that big Robocop visor and refusing to answer for his crimes.
Soon enough though, the groundswell to get some payback on Samuelsson started not long after the Neely incident. People wonder why Don Cherry seems so xenophobic. Maybe he was born that way but guys like Samuelsson didn't help.
For me, any guy that hammered Samuelsson was good with me. Despite his infamy for his cheap shot hit on Pierre Turgeon in the 1993 playoffs, Dale Hunter will always be a hero for breaking Samuelsson's jaw in a fight. Alas, that clip is not on YouTube but I remember it like it was yesterday. Samuelsson started wacking Hunter in the back of the head in front of the net. Hunter turned around to face him and then Sameulsson punched him. They both dropped the mitts and then Hunter dropped Samuelsson with a straight right to the face. The Cap Centre went absolutely nuts at the sight of Ulfie crumpled on the ice. To add to the indignity of getting his ass kicked, the refs also gave Samuelsson the seldom called "fighting with a visor" penalty. Later that season, I attended Dale Hunter's 1,000th game celebration. They showed a montage of clips from Dale's career and what got the biggest pop? Not Hunter's famous Game 7 overtime goal against Philadelphia in 1988. It was the shot of Hunter KO'ing Ulf.
In 1995 Samuelsson was traded to the Rangers. I am compelled to admit, my hatred for him subsided a bit. Maybe it was that he cooled the act or maybe it was that he wasn't on the Penguins anymore. Whatever the case, he seemed to stay out of trouble and play a much cleaner style. His most notable accomplishment with the Rangers was knocking out Wayne Gretzky's wife Janet with a pane of glass.
But it was with the Rangers that Samuelsson finally got the payback time I would have killed to see as a teenager. First, there was this hit from behind by Boston's Ken Belanger...
...and then the coup-de-grace, Tie Domi's sucker punch that knocked Samuelsson cold.
...that punch cost Domi 8 games and in the eyes of many, it was well worth it to see Ulfie get his comeuppance. You notice one thing about that clip: there aren't too many Rangers rushing to their teammate's defense. If it had been any other guy, a riot would have broken out with the whole Rangers bench trying to get at Domi. But they knew. Hockey players always know when a guy has something coming. And everybody on the ice knew Samuelsson had something like this coming.
Ulf retired in 2000, having bounced around between three teams in two years. The world of hockey did not miss him. For six years, he wasn't heard from and most assumed he went back to his pit in hell where Satan greeted him with a nice pat on the rear. But no, Samuelsson has reemerged as an assistant coach under Gretzky with the Phoenix Coyotes. As a kid, I was often asked, "What would happen if Ulf ever became a Washington Capital?" I figure my response would be, fittingly, a line out of a bad movie, in this case "Major League 2." There's a part where Bob Uecker is talking about the character of Jack Parkman, who, in the movie, was a loathsome slugger with Chicago. At one point Ueck says, "It's funny how a new uniform can change your attitude about a guy" before closing his hand over the microphone and saying "He's still a dick." I feel the same way about Ulf Samuelsson.
So we've had our first blizzard here on the East Coast, which means most of us were able to get out of work. Hoo-rah! Of course, the bad part is that I will have to drive an hour and change back to Coastal Delaware but, oh well. It's worth it to not have to sit in a Rehoboth Beach commissioners meeting. Before I get to the usual shenanigans I do in this space, for my friends on the West Coast or anywhere not on the East Coast, here's what it looks like outside here on the Eastern Shore of Maryland...
...so with that, all there really is to do today is blog, watch ridiculous action flicks like "Face/Off" and download stuff to iTunes. 'Cause you know I need to hear me some "Ten Seconds To Love." Anyway, on with the links, mostly regarding the Orioles, Ravens and Capitals but also includes anything else that may tickle my fancy. If you can dig it, SUCKAAAAA!
-Not all of our teams at THE Towson University have issues winning. Give it up for our swimming and diving team, which captured its second straight CAA title. They have a long way to catch the dance team, which won, I think, like 3 national championships in a row. We may not be good at football and basketball but our dance team will RULE your school's dance team. Beeeotch!
-Other O's items: first, Jeff Zrebiec has a story on Matt Wieters. I cannot wait until this kid shows up in B-Mo. He's going to be a good one. Second, it didn't take long for Rich Hill to get hurt. He's got some stiffness in his elbow and shoulder. Uh, not good. To make up for Hill's injury, the O's took a flier on oft-injured ex-Padre Adam Eaton. Great, so that way, if he makes the club he can get hurt for us just like he did for the Padres, Rangers and Phillies.
- Big Mike has a story on Samari Rolle, who, in light of the Domonique Foxworth signing and being asked to take a pay cut, now wants to be released. I am flat out opposed to doing this because in Baltimore, we need a guy who looks like Avon Barksdale from "The Wire" on the club. Samari: Avon:
- I spoke earlier of the legendary "The Wire." One thing I always find amusing is playing "Hey, it's That Guy from 'The Wire!'" Well, this week's "That Guy from 'The Wire'" winner is former Baltimore mayor and Maryland Governor Tommy Carcetti now appearing in the newest John Cena masterpiece, "12 Rounds."
- Tree-hugging liberal post of the day: "Comedian" Rush Limbaugh is under fire from new Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele. I love Republican on Republican crime.
- Finally, today's YouTube clip to swing your heavy metal hair to is very much on the political side but it rocks like a motherfucker. It's "No W" by Ministry.
There won't be a lot of posts today, I'll be watching the Caps game at 3 and then head to the rink to play my own game at 6:45. I might be able to squeeze a recap in there but I also might not be. But since only 6 of you read this thing anyway, it's probably not one of your bigger deals in life. Anyway, since it's Sunday and pretty girls=hits, I will forgo the usual Booker T picture and bring you Amanda Bynes, if for no other reason than she wore a Ravens t-shirt in one of her movies (not sure which one, I just remember seeing the trailer and being stunned she was wearing it). Since I couldn't find any pics of Amanda wearing said Ravens shirt, this shot will have to work...
-Ray Lewis' agent says he "might" return to Baltmo. Translation: "He's coming back with his tail tucked firmly between his legs."
"Asked about the Bill Guerin to Washington rumors -- which one of my sources shot down this morning, Boudreau said: 'We have Kozlov, Semin, Fehr, Bradley and Gordon as our right side. I think that's pretty good.'"
- One last bit of Caps news before I head down to the Greene Turtle to watch today's game (Thanks Easton F'n Cable!). Don Cherry of the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation ripped Alex Ovechkin for his celebrations. I won't give you the whole Cherry autobiography for those that don't know who he is, that's what Wikipedia is for, but in a nutshell, he's sort of like Rush Limbaugh or Bill O'Reilly meets Howard Cosell. First, here's Cherry, nicknamed Grapes', comments..
Now, I've been a fan of Grapes since I got his first Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Hockey video back in the early 90s. I think I know enough about him to know that anything he says must come with a grain of salt. His disdain of Europeans and guys with visors comes from a time when Euros, specifically guys like Ulf Samuelsson, Alexei Kovalev and Tomas Sandstrom, were known for taking dives, cheap shots and show-boating.
Now many of the commenters on the CBC's Hockey Night In Canada site, where you can watch Cherry's "Coach's Corner" segment, and on the WaPo's site are ripping Grapes a new asshole, and deservedly so. After all, it's clear this rant is either 1) xenophobic or 2) a very poor attempt to stand up for his buddy Sidney Crosby that came off as nationalist, racist and xenophobic. Because good old Canadian boys, like say...
Tiger Williams
Mike Foligno
Theo Fleury
and Mike Richards...
...would never celebrate excessively. Look, we've tried it the Joe Sakic way. Sakic is a great guy and a great player. But nobody outside the greater Denver area is saying, "Boy, Joe Sakic is in town, I gotta go see him!" Nothing against Sakic, but he doesn't exactly move the Q rating a whole lot. Hockey has had enough humble guys, it's part of the appeal of the sport for a lot of people. What the league needs is some oversize personalities. And no, I do not mean a bunch of Sean Avery's. I mean guys that aren't afraid to have fun, smile and show some flair. Everyone that watched the All-Star Game skills contest would probably agree that Ryan Getzlaf had a much better trick shot than Ovie. But Getzlaf treated it like a chore, whereas Ovie took the time to ham it up and have fun with the whole thing. That's what the league needs. If I haven't made my point yet, allow me to try to express it through this story.
On March 8 my friend and former co-worker Jermaine "Bunky" Murray will be attending his first hockey game. Bunk is a 25 year old African-American male that has maybe seen 15 minutes of hockey in his entire life. He's a football and basketball guy. Not exactly the type that gravitates towards hockey. But he willingly paid $80 to go to a Caps game because he WANTED to see Alex Ovechkin skate, hopefully score a goal and maybe do one of his celebrations. Isn't that what we, as hockey fans want? To get new fans and people interested in the game? I know that's what I'd like to see.
The bottom line is, Grapes is popular because he says stupid, ridiculous and outrageous things. No different than Limbaugh, O'Reilly, Olbermann or Cosell in his heyday. Anybody that says things that are that mean-spirited, bitter and jealous, it means that the person saying them is either an internet blogger or a someone that needs professional help. And while I'm not above making fun of someone, making fun of the insane just isn't my style. But Grapes, Mr. Ovie may want to have a word with you... "I must break you."
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